nukanep (![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small} nukanep) wrote,@ 2004-12-30 11:47:00 |
|
Talk less
Date Posted: 2003/06/22 01:12:00 AM EDT
Author: Dreem
Subject: Re: Friendster Lay (I know, I know)
wrote in message news:87521.13403@discussion.fastseductio
> One Shoe
> Supercuts
> My Cat Got Laid
> Engaged Chick
> Summer of Ripped Abs
> Kick Journey's Ass
> Broke Makeup Artist's Leg w/ Louisville Slugger
> Etc.
I can see you're naturally C&F and perhaps that helps your game massively, but
why tell these stories? What do you hope to achieve with them on a first meet?
I only see these as qualifying yourself to her and they don't contribute
anything to getting the lay.
***
Date Posted: 2003/06/22 05:38:00 AM EDT
Author: Dreem
Subject: Re: Friendster Lay (I know, I know)
wrote in message news:87604.13403@discussion.fastseductio
> On 6/22/03 1:12:25 AM, Dreem wrote:.
> >I only see these as qualifying yourself
> >to her and they don't contribute
> >anything to getting the lay.
> >
> >
>
>
> You don't get it at all, do you?
Yes I do get it. I used to tell stories like these in the past because I read
on ASF/mASF that you have to do most of the talking and get her to admire you.
So I told stories similar to yours, my own life experiences, with different
emotional push and pulls etc. I thought it was the stuff that created
attraction (information I got from the Maniac Plan and Mystery's posts). Now
I've come full circle and totally dropped them from my game.
Maybe if you're a natural story teller and LOVE to tell stories to EVERYONE
then that's cool. Just like someone who naturally has a Don Juan personality
would do better with SS style stuff than someone who is not. If you're just
telling stories to attract women, then you're QUALIFYING yourself and women can
see it.
YOU may get results from your story telling (if that's how you naturally are,
i.e. a talkative person), however this same approach would be detrimental to
another guy who is not a natural talkative or particularly cared to tell
stories.
From my experience when you talk too much, women sit back and qualify you and
make no further efforts to impress you.
My best successes have come from first meets where I sat back and hardly said
anything. Yes, I direct the conversation by introducing topics etc but leave
most of the talking to the chick. I don't act too impressed either, no matter
how hard she tries. I've even had dates where the chick is not very talkative
herself and not much conversation would take place between us, however I STILL
get the lay. On the other hand if try to make to much conversation and fill
the gaps I don't get a lay out of it.
I now firmly believe that talking too much works against me... and many other
men out there.
Think about it, if you watch two people talking... you'll notice that the
person doing the most talking and making the most effort of the two is the one
with LESS power in the situation.
> These stories are what CEMENTED my lay with this chick the other night.
Without
> these, I'm just another chump.
The stories did NOTHING. You see, YOU are the one who doesn't "get it".
Humans were having sex and reproducing LONG before we developed the ability to
speak. Stories DON'T create attraction. You're just mimicking what you've read
from other people and you think that's what works.
By the way do you know the language of sexual communication has no WORDS of
it's own? That's why most of what you SAY to a chick is meaningless to her
sexual inner core. You can for example just sit back and be aloof and THAT
would communicate something far more meaningful to her sexual core than a
million words or stories.
> They project MASSIVE VALUE onto me. Some of them tell her I'm alpha. Some
show
> my tender side how I love cute kitties. Some project danger, I'll break your
> fuckin leg. Some say I am a superstar. THE POINT IS: none of these stories
are
> "qualifying". They are cool stories of their own merit, the fact that they
> include things which portray me in a positive light is corollary, irrelevant
to
> the fact that they are such cool stories. i work them in NORMALLY in the
convo.
Again this is all what you've seen/read/heard from other guys and you're
MIMICKING it thinking it's what works. Yes, I used to do all these in the past
but have now moved on.
One day you'll realise that you don't need all these stories to get laid,
believe me.
***
Date Posted: 2003/06/22 01:39:00 PM EDT
Author: Dreem
Subject: Re: Friendster Lay (I know, I know)
wrote in message news:87623.13403@discussion.fastseductio
> On 6/22/03 5:38:29 AM, Dreem wrote:
> >I now firmly believe that talking too
> >much works against me... and many
> >other men out there.
>
> Dreem,
>
> I've noticed that we think alike in many ways. I would like to know
> more about your style. How would you describe your style?
When I first found ASF I studied SS religiously and went out and applied it. I
got a few quick successes (like 3 lays in the space of 2 weeks on one occasion)
as a fumbling novice, however the lays dried up as I got BETTER at SS... and my
lay rate became even WORSE than when I was an AFC. I eventually dropped SS
completely because it wasn't working... now I know why.
I've also tried MM and story telling in the past.
My game is now more DYD based and mostly to do with attitude and beliefs.
Below are two beliefs that dramatically improved the way women respond to me:
1. Stop chasing them
By "chase" I mean:
Doing anything that communicates you want something from her. Visibly (both in
body language and verbal communication) being the one of the two of you making
the most effort.
From past experience I've noticed that when I stopped caring about a particular
chick I was sarging, i.e. the point where I ACCEPTED that it was probably over
and looked on the verge of walking away (and then communicated this to her
implicitly). That is when the chick (who was previously playing games with me)
would suddenly change her attitude and begin to do positive things to help the
sarge. I realised that chicks play hard-to-get games with us not just because
they're manipulative people but because of something we're doing wrong.
So the goal is to do the right things from the very start. to not CHASE them.
2. She has NEEDS. Communicate that you know this, but hide your own needs
When a chick voluntarily comes into your reality (AI, accepting invitation,
IOIs, lingering to talk etc.) then you KNOW she wants something from you. So
your aim is to move things forward towards the bedroom only from the
perspective of HER needs. Bring her needs to the surface, let her know
(implicitly) that you know she wants you, all done implicitly of course, NEVER
be explicit to a woman, in any case direct communication is meaningless to her
sexual core. Also NEVER communicate your needs.
For example a simple thing I do now when I notice a chick is playing
hard-to-get with me is to ask her, "Do you still want to see me, or should we
forget this and move on?"
Every time I've asked this question or a variation of it I've noticed a sudden
change in the attitude of the chick. She becomes more positive and starts
responding well. As you can see, the question only communicates her needs and
makes no mention of mine, in other words I'm implying I can take her or leave
her, no big deal. THIS is the kind of implicit communication I'm talking
about.
When you meet with a chick for a 'date', the proper dynamics is when you
present yourself to her and give her the chance to SEDUCE you. YOU DON'T CHASE
HER (that's the big mistake many men make). When you invite her out she might
actually think she induced that invitation (i.e. it was all her work) and that
this is her chance to seduce you proper. If you sit back and DON'T chase her
or act like you want something from her, then she'll fill the void and begin to
work to get your attention. Remember, she is only there because SHE WANTS
SOMETHING FROM YOU. If you don't over shadow her needs with yours then hers
will come to the surface.
This has always been the way things were when I look back to all my successes.
With this kind of dynamics in place, the chick would feel like she is the one
GAINING, so will begin to work for it. At this point she would believe SHE is
the one seducing you, so when you make a move to progress things (like lean in
for a kiss, after seeing IOIs) it would look like she is the one who wanted it
and you're just fulfilling her needs. She would actually believe deep down
inside that she made you kiss her.
If you meet up with a chick and don't "chase" it does so many of the right
things:
Makes you the selector
Makes you cooler - higher status
Stops you coming across as needy
Makes you look more alpha
Gives her work to do
Gives you value
Date Posted: 2003/06/22 01:12:00 AM EDT
Author: Dreem
Subject: Re: Friendster Lay (I know, I know)
wrote in message news:87521.13403@discussion.fastseductio
> One Shoe
> Supercuts
> My Cat Got Laid
> Engaged Chick
> Summer of Ripped Abs
> Kick Journey's Ass
> Broke Makeup Artist's Leg w/ Louisville Slugger
> Etc.
I can see you're naturally C&F and perhaps that helps your game massively, but
why tell these stories? What do you hope to achieve with them on a first meet?
I only see these as qualifying yourself to her and they don't contribute
anything to getting the lay.
***
Date Posted: 2003/06/22 05:38:00 AM EDT
Author: Dreem
Subject: Re: Friendster Lay (I know, I know)
wrote in message news:87604.13403@discussion.fastseductio
> On 6/22/03 1:12:25 AM, Dreem wrote:.
> >I only see these as qualifying yourself
> >to her and they don't contribute
> >anything to getting the lay.
> >
> >
>
>
> You don't get it at all, do you?
Yes I do get it. I used to tell stories like these in the past because I read
on ASF/mASF that you have to do most of the talking and get her to admire you.
So I told stories similar to yours, my own life experiences, with different
emotional push and pulls etc. I thought it was the stuff that created
attraction (information I got from the Maniac Plan and Mystery's posts). Now
I've come full circle and totally dropped them from my game.
Maybe if you're a natural story teller and LOVE to tell stories to EVERYONE
then that's cool. Just like someone who naturally has a Don Juan personality
would do better with SS style stuff than someone who is not. If you're just
telling stories to attract women, then you're QUALIFYING yourself and women can
see it.
YOU may get results from your story telling (if that's how you naturally are,
i.e. a talkative person), however this same approach would be detrimental to
another guy who is not a natural talkative or particularly cared to tell
stories.
From my experience when you talk too much, women sit back and qualify you and
make no further efforts to impress you.
My best successes have come from first meets where I sat back and hardly said
anything. Yes, I direct the conversation by introducing topics etc but leave
most of the talking to the chick. I don't act too impressed either, no matter
how hard she tries. I've even had dates where the chick is not very talkative
herself and not much conversation would take place between us, however I STILL
get the lay. On the other hand if try to make to much conversation and fill
the gaps I don't get a lay out of it.
I now firmly believe that talking too much works against me... and many other
men out there.
Think about it, if you watch two people talking... you'll notice that the
person doing the most talking and making the most effort of the two is the one
with LESS power in the situation.
> These stories are what CEMENTED my lay with this chick the other night.
Without
> these, I'm just another chump.
The stories did NOTHING. You see, YOU are the one who doesn't "get it".
Humans were having sex and reproducing LONG before we developed the ability to
speak. Stories DON'T create attraction. You're just mimicking what you've read
from other people and you think that's what works.
By the way do you know the language of sexual communication has no WORDS of
it's own? That's why most of what you SAY to a chick is meaningless to her
sexual inner core. You can for example just sit back and be aloof and THAT
would communicate something far more meaningful to her sexual core than a
million words or stories.
> They project MASSIVE VALUE onto me. Some of them tell her I'm alpha. Some
show
> my tender side how I love cute kitties. Some project danger, I'll break your
> fuckin leg. Some say I am a superstar. THE POINT IS: none of these stories
are
> "qualifying". They are cool stories of their own merit, the fact that they
> include things which portray me in a positive light is corollary, irrelevant
to
> the fact that they are such cool stories. i work them in NORMALLY in the
convo.
Again this is all what you've seen/read/heard from other guys and you're
MIMICKING it thinking it's what works. Yes, I used to do all these in the past
but have now moved on.
One day you'll realise that you don't need all these stories to get laid,
believe me.
***
Date Posted: 2003/06/22 01:39:00 PM EDT
Author: Dreem
Subject: Re: Friendster Lay (I know, I know)
wrote in message news:87623.13403@discussion.fastseductio
> On 6/22/03 5:38:29 AM, Dreem wrote:
> >I now firmly believe that talking too
> >much works against me... and many
> >other men out there.
>
> Dreem,
>
> I've noticed that we think alike in many ways. I would like to know
> more about your style. How would you describe your style?
When I first found ASF I studied SS religiously and went out and applied it. I
got a few quick successes (like 3 lays in the space of 2 weeks on one occasion)
as a fumbling novice, however the lays dried up as I got BETTER at SS... and my
lay rate became even WORSE than when I was an AFC. I eventually dropped SS
completely because it wasn't working... now I know why.
I've also tried MM and story telling in the past.
My game is now more DYD based and mostly to do with attitude and beliefs.
Below are two beliefs that dramatically improved the way women respond to me:
1. Stop chasing them
By "chase" I mean:
Doing anything that communicates you want something from her. Visibly (both in
body language and verbal communication) being the one of the two of you making
the most effort.
From past experience I've noticed that when I stopped caring about a particular
chick I was sarging, i.e. the point where I ACCEPTED that it was probably over
and looked on the verge of walking away (and then communicated this to her
implicitly). That is when the chick (who was previously playing games with me)
would suddenly change her attitude and begin to do positive things to help the
sarge. I realised that chicks play hard-to-get games with us not just because
they're manipulative people but because of something we're doing wrong.
So the goal is to do the right things from the very start. to not CHASE them.
2. She has NEEDS. Communicate that you know this, but hide your own needs
When a chick voluntarily comes into your reality (AI, accepting invitation,
IOIs, lingering to talk etc.) then you KNOW she wants something from you. So
your aim is to move things forward towards the bedroom only from the
perspective of HER needs. Bring her needs to the surface, let her know
(implicitly) that you know she wants you, all done implicitly of course, NEVER
be explicit to a woman, in any case direct communication is meaningless to her
sexual core. Also NEVER communicate your needs.
For example a simple thing I do now when I notice a chick is playing
hard-to-get with me is to ask her, "Do you still want to see me, or should we
forget this and move on?"
Every time I've asked this question or a variation of it I've noticed a sudden
change in the attitude of the chick. She becomes more positive and starts
responding well. As you can see, the question only communicates her needs and
makes no mention of mine, in other words I'm implying I can take her or leave
her, no big deal. THIS is the kind of implicit communication I'm talking
about.
When you meet with a chick for a 'date', the proper dynamics is when you
present yourself to her and give her the chance to SEDUCE you. YOU DON'T CHASE
HER (that's the big mistake many men make). When you invite her out she might
actually think she induced that invitation (i.e. it was all her work) and that
this is her chance to seduce you proper. If you sit back and DON'T chase her
or act like you want something from her, then she'll fill the void and begin to
work to get your attention. Remember, she is only there because SHE WANTS
SOMETHING FROM YOU. If you don't over shadow her needs with yours then hers
will come to the surface.
This has always been the way things were when I look back to all my successes.
With this kind of dynamics in place, the chick would feel like she is the one
GAINING, so will begin to work for it. At this point she would believe SHE is
the one seducing you, so when you make a move to progress things (like lean in
for a kiss, after seeing IOIs) it would look like she is the one who wanted it
and you're just fulfilling her needs. She would actually believe deep down
inside that she made you kiss her.
If you meet up with a chick and don't "chase" it does so many of the right
things:
Makes you the selector
Makes you cooler - higher status
Stops you coming across as needy
Makes you look more alpha
Gives her work to do
Gives you value
